Wednesday, January 18, 2006
Tipping and Desis
Why are we such poor tippers?
Most Indians in America are poor tippers – please note that I used the word most, so if you are among the few that tip generously, consider yourself the exception or the minority. So, as I said – we tend to be poor tippers – why?
If I had to generalize it, I would say that most Indians (excluding ABCD’s) come to the U.S. as students or on work visas. So most students or employees, usually hard-pressed for money, calculating the cost of things in comparison to India, commenting on how expensive things are, usually try to save when it comes to tipping. Their rationale is that they paid for the meal – why should they tip? The waiter’s are getting paid for serving them, so shouldn’t that be enough? Not many people know that in a restaurant, waiters make minimum wage, sometimes less and that at the end of the day, tips are collected and divided among the wait-staff and kitchen employees. I don’t know how it works in India, but here, the wait-staff work for tips. They usually try to offer their best service, but sometimes their work load, their moods and perhaps even their stereotypes get the best of them and we see some sour-faced workers who more often than not transfer their angst to us and in the end we walk out justifying this sentiment to our poor tipping percentage.
In India, there is no standard percentage for tipping. If people leave Rs. 5 or Rs 10 for anywhere from a Rs. 150 – Rs. 500 meal, people are happy.
But in the U.S., tipping at restaurants is mandatory, especially if you are eating there. It doesn’t matter if the restaurant is a hole in a wall, it doesn’t matter if it is your neighborhood Chinese joint, nor does it matter if it is your local Indian chaat vala. I noticed that people tend to offer or rather feel obligated to cough up the dough when the restaurant looks fancy and server or waiters are dressed in the traditional black and white attire. But the minute that the savvy Indian recognizes that the restaurant or eatery is a little less than fancy, the rules of tipping change. Now, instead of the standard 15%, it becomes perhaps 2%, perhaps 5% or perhaps nothing, just like it used to be back home.
I remember this one instance when I went to a Chinese restaurant for lunch. I saw some friends heading out and I said hi, chatted a few minutes with them and asked to be seated. The owner of the restaurant, a sweet Chinese middle-aged lady came up to me and asked me in a surprised tone – “do you know those people?” Yes, I replied, they are my husband’s friends. Well, I don’t want to see them in my restaurant again she said. I was shocked as she was normally really nice. So I asked her what happened and she said that the couple had a full meal for lunch and that when it came time to pay the bill, they paid and left the change, which came up to .35 cents, as the tip. She was furious. I don’t want such people in my restaurant she said, throwing her hands up in the air.
I could read her thoughts – cheap Indian people, she was thinking. Is this the mentality of most immigrants, I wondered, or are we, as Indians, always trying to find the cheapest, fastest, way around things, as we typically do in India? It’s probably a bit of both, but remember this when you walk into a restaurant next – tipping the full 15% is good karma. Get used to this before the standard percentage goes up, as it has in some restaurants in New York City.
Most Indians in America are poor tippers – please note that I used the word most, so if you are among the few that tip generously, consider yourself the exception or the minority. So, as I said – we tend to be poor tippers – why?
If I had to generalize it, I would say that most Indians (excluding ABCD’s) come to the U.S. as students or on work visas. So most students or employees, usually hard-pressed for money, calculating the cost of things in comparison to India, commenting on how expensive things are, usually try to save when it comes to tipping. Their rationale is that they paid for the meal – why should they tip? The waiter’s are getting paid for serving them, so shouldn’t that be enough? Not many people know that in a restaurant, waiters make minimum wage, sometimes less and that at the end of the day, tips are collected and divided among the wait-staff and kitchen employees. I don’t know how it works in India, but here, the wait-staff work for tips. They usually try to offer their best service, but sometimes their work load, their moods and perhaps even their stereotypes get the best of them and we see some sour-faced workers who more often than not transfer their angst to us and in the end we walk out justifying this sentiment to our poor tipping percentage.
In India, there is no standard percentage for tipping. If people leave Rs. 5 or Rs 10 for anywhere from a Rs. 150 – Rs. 500 meal, people are happy.
But in the U.S., tipping at restaurants is mandatory, especially if you are eating there. It doesn’t matter if the restaurant is a hole in a wall, it doesn’t matter if it is your neighborhood Chinese joint, nor does it matter if it is your local Indian chaat vala. I noticed that people tend to offer or rather feel obligated to cough up the dough when the restaurant looks fancy and server or waiters are dressed in the traditional black and white attire. But the minute that the savvy Indian recognizes that the restaurant or eatery is a little less than fancy, the rules of tipping change. Now, instead of the standard 15%, it becomes perhaps 2%, perhaps 5% or perhaps nothing, just like it used to be back home.
I remember this one instance when I went to a Chinese restaurant for lunch. I saw some friends heading out and I said hi, chatted a few minutes with them and asked to be seated. The owner of the restaurant, a sweet Chinese middle-aged lady came up to me and asked me in a surprised tone – “do you know those people?” Yes, I replied, they are my husband’s friends. Well, I don’t want to see them in my restaurant again she said. I was shocked as she was normally really nice. So I asked her what happened and she said that the couple had a full meal for lunch and that when it came time to pay the bill, they paid and left the change, which came up to .35 cents, as the tip. She was furious. I don’t want such people in my restaurant she said, throwing her hands up in the air.
I could read her thoughts – cheap Indian people, she was thinking. Is this the mentality of most immigrants, I wondered, or are we, as Indians, always trying to find the cheapest, fastest, way around things, as we typically do in India? It’s probably a bit of both, but remember this when you walk into a restaurant next – tipping the full 15% is good karma. Get used to this before the standard percentage goes up, as it has in some restaurants in New York City.
